Return to Newsletters
 
by Joan Collins
©Joan Collins. All Right reserved.

 
Greetings!
Just so you'll know, I'm not selling sweat socks or basketballs. I'm sending this newsletter to you because I want to let you know that I've become a personal and business coach, and what I'm offering is special one-on-one assistance to those who want the best for their lives. For years athletes, actors and musicians have used coaches to bring out their personal best. Recently business executives, professionals and individuals are achieving astounding results with coaches too.

I'm thrilled to be in this new profession. For one thing I see it as an opportunity to use my background and education (M.Ed. in educational psychology and 20 years in marketing and public relations) to help people get to the top of their game. What could be better? Everybody wins! Coaching also gives people the ability to live simpler and richer lives-a power combination we can all use.

So there you have it. Look for The Coach's Bench twice each month. Each edition will contain one of my articles. If you find what you read to be helpful, I hope you'll pass it along to your friends and associates so they can subscribe.

Back To Top

 
Are You Missing Your Life?
OK, so that's not a question you get asked every day, but here's the rest of it: Are you spending so much time regretting the past and dreading the future that you are missing right now, today, this minute?

Laura, a young cancer survivor recently told me how her view has changed. "I was missing my life," she said. "Before cancer I thought a lot about the years I wasted partying after college, not getting a decent job, not saving money. Then once I had a good job I worried about my boss, my mortgage payments, just everything. Now I know I was missing all the good stuff, like watching two goofy birds bicker in a tree outside my window."

Back To Top

 
Try This Exercise
Laura's life altering experience can be a wake up call for all of us. I know it hit me with a jolt. Try this exercise: For a day try to be conscious of your thoughts. How many are seated in the past? How many float off into the future? Of course we are all products of our past; we all operate in that context, but we don't want to let the past dominate the present, and we don't want to harbor regret. Remember the only thing we can change about the past is how we perceive it. Let it go.

During your test day, try to figure out how much time you spend thinking of the future. It's great to dream and hope for good times ahead, and it's absolutely essential to plan responsibly for the future, but remember that while you're dreaming about someday, you're missing today. Another habit a lot of us have concerning the future is spending too much time with those old enemies, fear and dread. Did you know studies have shown that 90% of what we worry about never happens? Think how much better off we'd be if we worried 90% less!

The future is truly out of our control. Sure, we can work to influence it, but none of us knows what the future holds. Dale Carnegie in his classic book "How To Stop Worrying And Start Living" urges living in day-tight compartments. "Shut the iron doors on the past and the future...live each day until bedtime," he counsels.

Finally, during your test day, how many of your thoughts are seated in the present? How many deal with the people, the season, the colors, the conversations, laughter, smells, food, music and love that come your way just for that one day? Of course there will be unpleasant things too, but just for one day I'm betting the good that you choose to notice will far outweigh the negative.

Back To Top

 
Some Ideas For Getting Back Into Your Life
Idea #1 - Make a habit of living each day in the moment

So if we can't control the past or the future, that leaves the present, warts and all. What we can control in the present is our response to it. In other words, it's up to us. The good news is that living in the present moment, one day at a time, can become a habit, a very beneficial habit. We free up incredible energy to concentrate on the tasks at hand when we're not bogged down with baggage from another time. We're a lot more present and loving to our family and friends, and we're healthier too. And if you don't think it's fun to savor every bite and color and smile, just try it.

Idea #2 - Recognize treasure when it shows up

My friend Joanne was enjoying breakfast out on the island of Kauai. She was seated on a lanai that was covered in purple bougainvillea blossoms. The blue Pacific roared in the distance, birds chirped everywhere, and above the distant mountains a double rainbow glowed against retreating rain clouds. Joanne says she felt such contentment she gestured toward the rainbow and commented to her companion, "There is no greater treasure there, this is truly the end of the rainbow." A few minutes later a couple was seated at the next table. When they had a chance to take in the scene that lady said to her husband, "If only we could get to the treasure at the end of that rainbow."

Like the lady at the next table, too many of us spend time looking for and needing what is just beyond our reach. When unexpected people or solutions show up, we hardly recognize or appreciate them even though they're often better than what we thought we needed.

Idea #3 Say "yes" to life!

There's no use resisting what life has to offer. We're all going to get our share of joy and pain. As we grow older we tend to forget how to accept joy as a fully legitimate part of living. Perhaps we forget because we distrust joy, knowing that pain may be just around the corner. We forget how to wiggle our toes in the sand and sing gloriously as we drive down a country road. Oh we may have our moments of joy, but we don't want to be caught with our guard down. At the same time we tend to feel that there's something wrong with us if we encounter serious business difficulty and personal sorrow. We put on a good show, but inside we feel as though we're the only ones with less than perfect lives. Saying "yes" to life means that we fully accept the joys and the pain that are bound to come our way. Saying "yes" allows us to be honest about life, to seize it with both hands, and to live each day in the moment.

Back To Top

 
Try My Complimentary Coaching Session
Several of my clients have benefited greatly from utilizing these ideas. There are many other ideas to explore, of course. I have a few openings in my practice for people who are serious about getting the best for their lives. Whether you're a professional, a business owner or a savvy individual, that's what I want for you - the best life you can imagine. I'd like to offer you a complimentary coaching session. Email me at jcollins@a2btracking.com to set up a half-hour telephone session or call 781-934-6804 and leave a message. All coaching sessions are strictly confidential.

Back To Top




Return to Newsletters